Certain about one thing, in Uncertain, Texas.

Certain of one thing, in the town of Uncertain, Texas!

By Merita B. McCormack

Leesburg, VA

Adding more passengers to our road trip to Texas , changed it all. We had previously settled for the generous offer to stay at someone’s house, but then figuring out three people were too many, we decided to look for accommodations the night before we set for the trip.

Having a daughter who is a “Martha Stewart” like organizer and who has a wide range of knowledge of beautiful places in the US  and also having a husband who loves nature, fishing, ducks and all that wildfowl stuff, we agreed that a place with a lake, between West Monroe, LA and Tyler, TX was ideal for our two days stay in the area.  West Monroe is where “Duck Dynasty” people are, a favourite family show which we have seen some times on TV, and Tyler was a place where a family member had to be for those days.

Thus rushing to book a place was not a problem, getting to book a place was a problem. The facility we choose “Caddo Lake Retreat House “ did not have an online booking, as we are so used to on the East Coast.  We also called but got no one answer, as it was after hours, so we sent an email, hoping some one would answer. We were to leave the next day in the afternoon.  So it happened, a very happy voice called me the next day and assured me we had the “Retreat house” as that weekend (Aug 20th) everybody was going to travel opposite to us, to see the solar eclipse and the place would not be full of tourists and also people, were going home from their holidays, starting school. It sounded like the place was quite busy! That gave me a lot of assurance. I was happy to hear that we had a place and gave her my credentials to charge my credit card. All was set; we got on the road and enjoyed the ride. We spent a night in Knoxville TN, a night in Little Rock, AR and then finally arrived in the friendly state of Texas.  I would add here that Tennessee was beautiful and we enjoyed the view through the Smokies. Before leaving TN, we stopped by a restaurant by the “Mud Island” on Mississippi river and then headed out to Arkansas, which was very different from TN. Open land, narrower roads, and not many trees, also very hot.  We saw many fields of rice, soya, and cotton plants. Wonderful, smiling friendly people at every stop we made. As we crossed the state border and unto Texas,  we noticed the lone star state "show off" itself at the border, like bridge colouring of red, white and blue,  clean and very visible state map  carvings on the bridge walls, signs which were inviting visitors etc.  Then we hit the real rural Texas, land, land, ranches, land and ranches again; here and there a cabin, a house, a farm, and open land again.  We missed the big cities and is not an intention to write about the big cities of Texas here.  As soon as we dropped the family member in Tyler we headed out to Caddo Lake. Our intention was to spend the night there and visit Duck Dynasty crowd the next day.  As soon as we started driving we realized we better get gas, as it seemed very rural and very open.  In about ninety minutes we arrived in the area of Caddo lake and first thing we saw, was this big sign which read:

“The Church of Uncertain welcomes you” . We had to smile at that. Latter on we saw a sign saying “Uncertain Inn”. Well we realized this was a town with a funny name and of many uncertain things. As we  were wondering how that name had come about  it was time for us to really look for the final destination for the night . We pulled in the last road, which to me was the “real” end of the world, as it had all dead ends  on most turns and it looked pretty empty, and to tell the truth, not very impressive from the structures of the dwellings, which looked like old RV-s transformed into homes to the unpaved roads, with trees that gave me the impression of wilderness and lots of dog barking around. A little shop , the only shop had a sign on the window, idicatiing that was the shop of everything from sadnwiches and pizzas to hardware. But that closed at everyday at 7pm. I was starving in fact and was terrified of lack of proper restaurants around.  I was hoping that our place would at least have some sort of cooling, as it was really hot and humid. The trees were tall and covered in Spanish moss, indicative of high humidity.  We drove further down the road and to the address of the email but could not see the name of the house we were supposed to be in.  I was kind of panicking a bit as we felt lost, was hungry  and may be we thought we were scammed. Finally we see the number of the house but did not match the name on the email address. Here on the not so flat drive way, stood a pick up truck and its driver just getting ready to go in the house. He looked at us and clearly was puzzled. We were more so. I even said: “Oh Gosh, where did we come”. The guy had the longest beard I had seen, an old hat, the most worn jeans on him,  a cigarette in his mouth and the pick up truck had plenty of black bags on it.  With a heavy southern accent he greeted us and said “Can I help you?" which to me sounded like he said who are you and what do you want here? At least that’s what I thought it felt like.  I immediately  showed to my husband the email text I had photographed earier fearing of loss of service  and  told him we were supposed to be spending two nights in the "retreat house". The long bearded guy said: “This ain’t it sir” and seeing us getting even more confused, he swiftly introduced himself saying: “By the way I am Red and I am the caretaker here but I don’t expect no one Sir. Let me call them” he added, refering to the owners.   

I tried to make a call on my one to the person I had spoken few days before, but no luck, no service there. Red joked at me he said “You must have ATT ma’m, and though you have a fancy phone (referring to my outdated Iphone), mine works better here, madam”,- pointing to his old  flip phone smiling.  I had no time to laugh as I was anxious to hear from the booking person who was unreachable at the moment.  Finally he got a hold of Shelley, the person I had spoken to. The more Red talked with her, mentioning additional money, the more I felt we had made the biggest mistake booking just like that. I heard Red saying the retreat house was not ready, and the Lodge (where we had parked) was supposed to host another group, which had not showed up yet. John and I looked at each other, and while I worried, John who has never judged anyone, was happy to admire the natural place. Our son was also happy to have finally arrived and assured me that the guy was normal and very friendly. I was on the other side, terrified. Finally, after some back and forth convo, we were offered “the lodge” for the same price.  The friendly woman on the phone had forgotten to tell Red about us and she apologized. Then we walked it and it was a beautiful surprise to see the house.  Red continued to talk and joke at us, telling scary stories of alligators and I apologized to him for my stiffness. He said Ma’am you have every right to be afraid, we are a swampy place with swamp monsters and I represent the Swamp Monster Show. I joked back and said you should be on the Duck Dynasty show. He was not much aware of it as he said every one is like those people here and that was the way of life there.

I began to relax and told Red :  "God put you here, as we were lost". He pulled the cigarette off his mouth, looked at me with his smiling eyes and said: “Ma’am, I think you are right. God is good”.  I added that guardian angels must have been looking after us. He said “ Ma'am; say it again?”  He had hard time understanding my accent. As soon as he got what I said, he again said: “Ma'am. Sure God put us together here, as I don’t know what would had become of ya’ll".  My husband and son took care of bags and I wanted to just rest.  But as soon as we went in and looked on the back porch, there was a beauty indescribable. Cypress River was out here below and cypress trees dressed with Spanish moss, Oak trees standing tall like they had stories to share, butterflies greeting us, birds chirping, fir, pine trees, ivy and all, saying welcome to the virgin nature. It was beyond beautiful it looked like God had put a slice of Heaven in front of me. I turned to Red and as I thanked him I asked where is the guest manual so I can know where to go to find food and Red told us it was all there, on top of dining table, two pieces of papers where it was handwritten all you need. And he then was our companion fro two days. I will not go into many details, as there is a lot, but will tell the ending of our 48 hours there.  We were seating out, once more, in the back porch talking about Caddo lake and its story and discussing the book we read those two days titled “Caddo was”  so impressed with his chatty nature and his brown eyes and red bird  I asked him:
"Red, what is your background, where is your family from?". 
,“I was born and baptized in Louisiana ma’am, but my father was Italian and my mom was German Irish.”- he answered.    I immediately thought Louisiana Catholic, but held my tongue.  He then told us stories of his Italian grandma pinching his and his sister’s cheeks when she wanted to praise and them and he had teary-eyed moments sharing those stories and saying he has no more family around.  And he sipped his drink and smoked his cigarette.  He was peaceful and nostalgic. It was a very touching moment. I thought to ask him one more detail, I said which part of Italy and what was his last name.  For some reason I always ask Italians if they are from Southern Italy, looking for the Arbresh connection. So I was digging for that.  He said well, I don’t know if you know the last name, but it is Forgionne and he said it exactly like Italians say it, and he continued:  "I can’t tell you for sure where we are from, but do you know of a man, of a Papa, Papa, Pio my dad called him". I froze and looked at John who was also curious. Then Red pulling his cigarette from the mouth, pointed towards his palms and his feet, signalling  for the wounds of Christ crucified. I could not believe what he was saying. John said : "Padre Pio?" He said:  "No,no,  papa, papa, Pio,  the old Catholic man".  John was continuing to say Padre Pio, and I said Francisco Forgionne? He said, yes, that one, the one who...." and he  was continuing to point on his palms and feet. 
"The priest with the stigmata?”- I asked  

“Yes, Ma’am, yes, the one who had bleeding hands” - he continued – “that one”. His name was in the paper here many years ago and my dad told me he is my cousin.  We had same last name and are cousins Ma'am".  

I could no longer wait and pulled out of my purse a Padre Pio Booklet of prayers and showed it to him. He, seeing the photo of Padre Pio, exclaimed:  "Yes Ma’am, it’s him, he looks just like my dad, it was this photo on the paper here, Ma’am, many years ago" (he was referring to Padre Pio’s Canonization story probably), and his eyes got teary again, saying over and over again: "Yes, it’s him, we have same last name, ma'am".

After that moment ,  I had to then share with him our Padre Pio  many stories and devotions  and we sat down for long time as Padre Pio is a spiritual grandfather to many, so he is very special to us, too. But meeting his relative there, in rural Texas, a  man, who was not raised catholic,  for whom,  at first I did not have the most charitable thoughts, and who was so genuine and real, so open and friendly, so modest and leading a simple life, was a different story. We talked for a long time and Red was happy to hear more about Padre Pio, and I saw the spark in his eyes becoming more visible and the joy in him very obvious. He was happy to accept the booklet which he promised to read  it through and through, was happy to look a the photos, very happy to hear that there are many relatives of Padre Pio in USA, and that one is a friend of mine. He felt reconnected to the family and we all felt and expressed that God was alive and present there and then. For some reason, though he was a Baptist, he brought up the sacraments of the Catholic Church and we spoke mostly on Confession.  The conversation went in to so much details and went fast and there was so much talk about holy subjects that we ourselves could not understand how.  It was a beautiful conversation. Afterwards we all were wondering about this all and we agreed that God’s CERTAIN LOVE had put us all  together for that time in Uncertain Texas

Since then Red has asked us almost daily to pray to Padre Pio for him. I told him, we will but it is us who need him to pray to Padre Pio, especially for me ,who judged his cousin so harsh! Afterall, Padre Pio will know who to hear first, his cousin of course! <3 Padre Pio, pray for us all! 

Bumps and Rough Road Ahead!

In  early July, this year, we were notified as a neighborhood that parking on the roadside in front of our homes, would not be permitted in early August. The  State authority on the Road Maintenance was letting us know way in advance  on what was about to happen. They were repaving our roads! Yeay!  We were happy! We started looking around, planned, tried to fit all cars in the driveway  and finally figured that out well. We were happy to be all panned and ready to see the road paved! After all,  it had now been a while that our little neighborhood's road was scraped, washed and paved. We were expecting visitors in the third week of the August and we could not wait to  have them, share with them our home and why not brag a  bit on how cute and quiet  this neighborhood is and how peaceful is and also how smooth our (soon to be paved ) road is.

Well as time passed, and as with any government project, it took a while.

Our guests came and went , only to see and experience the badly shaped road, which had been scraped by then. They were all stopped and detoured, went through all the cones, all unmarked pavements and all the working signs. They did not mind it,  it seemed, and we pretended to be okay with it,  though I wished it had been a smoother road for them.

After they had gone , every day I drove around our neighborhood, I could not help but experience the impatience, the inconvenience, the effects of the bumps, the uneven roads and the long wait of "stop"- "slow" signs. I always felt bad that our guests whom we  had not seen for more than ten years had to experience that as well. I felt pain, a bit of anger, impatience and of course my vanity was having a feast. As I tried to rid myself off these feelings, I decided to add a prayer so I could  shorten my chain of  my inner complaints about the scrapped roads , the bumps, the delays, the inconvenience, the impatience associated with it. It then occurred to me that the road would not be well paved afterwards if it didn't go through all this "cleansing" process.  It needed the signs, the scrapping, the washing, the sealing....

And then I thought about the  soul, our human soul. Our soul goes through the same process too. All those bumps that we encounter in our spiritual life,  are to slow us down to make us consider the road ahead of us. All of those "stop" and "slow" signs  in our life are to remind us to navigate carefully in what we do and how we do it.  All that scraping and the discomfort that comes with it, is the  examination of conscience and the anxiety in the long line at confession. All that uncomfortable shaking  during a rough road is like our lifelong sacrifices. And our visitors witnessing our messy road  but our cheerful home it is the perfect symbol of friends seeing you when you are at your lowest point, because it is in "when I am weak that I am strong "(ct from 2 Cor. 12)

Finally our road was paved and it is a pleasure  now to drive....

That I thought in the spiritual life is  like the grace we receive as a reward of all those sacrifices, all those bumps and detours, all those moments of feeling bad and  especially the grace  we receive after a good confession. It is indeed powerful and beautiful, we become brand new, just like my neighborhood road, it is brand new !

So any time we see "Stop", "Bump", " Rough Road Ahead" "Slow down"
Let us not forget:

"Newly Paved Road",  "Reconciliation and Grace" is  also waiting ahead of us if we navigate those other signs correctly and patiently.

By Merita B. McCormack
August 29, 2015

Merita

Blessed Mother Teresa- The Catholic Nun of Albanian blood

Five years ago to this day, though the house we were moving in was not ready,  we decided to spent that night at this new home for us. We were tired of traveling and moving stuff and since we  had just installed the new phone line, we thought we would be okay to stay here.

My husband and I, both wanted  to use the new phone  to call call our  parents and  share the news. But we decided to have some coffee first and were sitting down enjoying the children playing with each other in the back yard

The week before that  day there were many issues we were facing  with and among other prayers, one I chose, there  was the one which I  kind of made myself, asking  Bl.Mother Teresa to intercede for us. The words were all in Albanian,  and in a way I felt like I was pestering my own granny  for a favor which I thought we needed  to be  given.....

It was that evening of August 26,  and  while in the morning I knew, by evening I was almost  forgetting that it was Bl.Mother Teresa birthday.....I was  very busy right...?!!

As we sat down to sip that first coffee in the new house , to our surprise the phone rang and I picked it up.

The accent of the man's voice was clearly Indian. I was wondering who that might be...

In a very gentle voice he said: "Hello  Merita,  this is a phone call from the Catholic ......(he mentioned the organization name)  in India. We wanted to thank you for your help (I have never donated anything to  that organization) and we wanted to say : Enjoy your evening with your family and have a good time throughout the year!"

My jaw dropped , as I recalled my prayer and that on that day it was what would had been Mother Teresa 's Centennial birthday.  I also recalled that I had prayed and had asked Mother Teresa to help us....  Call it coincidence or  call it God's wink :-) , call it whatever you may like, but to me, it was very unique and meaningful! Still to this day is and will remain so.

 I will definitely not forget the gift we received on the first night of our new house
oh, and by the way...those prayers were answered , too :-)   ...

Let us never forget to ask our saints in heaven....they are there to help and aid us....Let us never be afraid to ask for the their intercession...and if we have some one close to our hearts, like we Albanians are so fortunate to have Blessed Mother Teresa, let us double those requests to them. Just ask.....She , like many others,  after all,  is a close friend and beloved child of God,  as she really took care of  Jesus' many wounds.
Blessed Mother Teresa,  our saint and beloved sister in blood, as we  gratefully remember you today, we  invoke your name and ask you  to please pray for the Albanians  and for the  people of the whole world! Amen!

The joys and the sorrows of a Papal Visit to an (almost) forgotten country.

By Merita McCormack*

Soon we will experience the event of the year--if not the century--for Albanians all over the world. For more than twenty years, the Albanian nation seems to have been in the hearts and minds of the Popes. It is amazing that two of the last three popes have made it a priority to visit Albania. Now Pope Francis is about to meet and greet Albanians in their homeland and will reach tens of thousands more around the globe via live streaming. He will be received with true joy and love, as well as with tears and open hearts. The world will witness the spirit of this small, vibrant nation whose roots are in the Balkans and has many sons and daughters around the globe.

This upcoming papal visit is a signal of hope, faith, and love not just to Albanians but to the entire world. It is especially important in current times when we see so much despair, poverty, ideological and political war, marginalization, and the breaking up of families. The very thread of the fabric of society is endangered when abortion is a commodity and when marriage is considered an inconvenience.

Popes have appreciated the resilience of the Albanian nation. Although it has experienced difficult times it has survived. As small as it is, this nation that has suffered and lost so much, has also been blessed. Albanians keep their families together, they thrive in community, they are hospitable and friendly, joyful and hardworking, warriors and entertainers, and above all, many are very godly people. Albania has given the world Mother Teresa , George Kastrioti –Scanderbeg, and many other important people.

When the Ottomans occupied their lands, Albanians stood strong and kept them at bay for a while.  Although the occupation seemed to last forever, Albanian kept their identity, spoke their language, sang their songs and ballads, and never forgot God, their creator.

Then communism came, a beast of immeasurable dimensions, and through the iron fist did the unthinkable. Growing up during that period, my generation of Albanians can testify to what happened to many. It is sad that some embraced that ideology. There is still no true reconciliation because of a lack of individual reconciliation between  some people and God. Unless that individual reconciliation takes place, all of the fake smiles and fake words, all of the pompous behavior and shiny shows, which are not from God, will fall away.

That is a sorrow that my generation and that of my parents have to this day. Not only because it is a matter of justice (which is due) but also out of love for every Albanian whose eternal destiny might be at risk.  This papal visit is an opportunity that should not be missed, either on a personal or a societal level.

In that light, I hope that the joy that the visit, generated by God almighty, and reflected in the loving and humble pontiff and many holy priests, sisters, religious and lay people, will soften the hearts of every one.  I hope and pray that this visit stirs in the hearts of people the desire to repent and seek forgiveness, the desire to cleanse the deep wounds caused by vices and sin, and allows them to be blessed with the grace of the Almighty and have hope in divine providence.

May the conversion of hearts take place and the Albanian people seek and embrace the truth, which they can encounter in a practical and special way this Sunday.

As for the Albanian martyrs of the Church, we all should rejoice in them. May their blood, which is joined in the suffering of our Lord and Redeemer, be the offering through which the Albanian nation can hope to be redeemed

Welcome to Albania Pope Francis!

*Merita McCormack serves as the  President of “ VATRA-Washington DC Regional Chapter"

In God we trust!

In God We Trust

by Merita Bajraktari-McCormack

It was the mid of the 1980-s. We, the Albanians who lived during those years in the country, remember very well the great economic and spiritual suffering. Economically the country was among the world’s poorest and we were heading towards starvation and we were also empty spiritually.  Our brain was being filled with Marxist-Leninist ideology and for people of my generation, who were just young children at that time it was a very confusing period. It was constantly filled with uncertainty and a lot of stress.

I had “escaped“ the communist regime’s grip for the moment and found myself a student at the Agricultural Institute of  Kamėz, today known as the Agriculture University of Tirana. I say “escape” as  my  family’s  political “biography " was   a “gloomy one” . That meant my family was an anticommunist one and that we were “stamped” with that name, bearing no rights to study or to move.

The local communist party chiefs were not so comfortable with letting me go and study beyond High School, but it had already happened. In another story I share how did that happen. At college we were a small group of students who were watched carefully and were kept under a "radar" as to what we would do or say. We were those students who, in the subjects of Marxist ideology and the History of the  Socialist Labour (Communist) Party of Albania would never be graded with the top marks. We were automatically denied a couple of grades in those general education subjects just because of who we were (politically that is).

The first day that I put foot on the premises of the Institute, someone I knew told me to look at a gray haired man, in his early fifties.

- “Look at that man,”-I heard,- “he  is the great philosopher,  the number one Atheist  in the country.  He is professor Hako, which Pope John Paul  II has condemned  to death, a condemnation  in absentia”

- “What “, - I asked -, rolling my eyes

 - “The Vatican doesn’t do that, it can never sentence someone to death like that, have you any brains in you head ?”,  - I wondered

-       “I sure do “, - said the person – “he is a philosopher that has maddened the Vatican and through his arguments  he has shown that religion really is the "opium " for the people”.

        

I had so much to do those first days, so I really forgot about that encounter and that professor until 1987 when he lectured my class on Marxism and Leninism Theory and Ideology. That was during my junior year in college. It was the year 1987, when the pluralism of ideas began, the pluralism of opinions and of thoughts were allowed and wee to be tolerated. People could now begin to express different opinions.

And, we, the students at the Institute, were part of it, in the hope that one day we would be able to finally say something freely, without the fear of being persecuted for what we might say. We hoped!

Back into the lecture hall, it was a lecture on Marxist subjects, as usual. At the end of the lecture the professor asked:

-     “ Any one has any questions?”

-       The atheist professor of Marxism  had just explained something " dialectic " that  nothing disappears  but everything evolves and is transformed .

- “Here” , - the professor had  said , - “you burn  the wood ,  it becomes ashes,  you spread the ashes  in the field of wheat  or corn and that gives  nutrition to the plants it is a chain, it changes, it becomes something else, never disappears, it only evolves”.

- “What about the soul , professor , what does the soul evolves to ?” - cried

one of the students around me.

- “What did you say?”-the professor asked

There was silence

- “Any questions?”- the professor asked

Silence again .

- “So let us close, let us  seal it for today ,  there is no  soul, there is no God,  just go  and live today ; when a man dies his life ends. He becomes just bones, just dirt afterwards….So there is no God ! There is just mother nature. Ehhhh” –he sighed- “I am not giving detailed explanations,”- and he went on closing his folder, preparing to leave the auditorium.

Gazi was a student who was transferred as a sophomore to us from   another school.

He had a special weakness for USA and was always carrying some American symbol and  was always being secretive about it. But he would share the “ forbidden American items” with only a handful of people.  I was one of the lucky students to be part of that “handful” group. That day Gazi had a ten dollars bill with him and while the professor was claiming that "there is no God, the transformation is natural, there is no God but just  Mother Nature  etc. ",  Gazi brought out the ten dollars note and said to me in a low  voice:

-       "Merita , you know English, what  does this sentence mean?” - and  he pointed at  the words printed on the bill:

-        

-        " In God We Trust "

-        

I barely kept my laughter and though I was sure Gazi knew what that meant, I wrote it on a piece of paper with a large print as to reiterate what we daily denied : “ NE ZOT NE BESOJME” – that is in Albanian for  “In God We Trust ". I handed the piece of paper to Gazi who smiled and read it out loud.

- “Is there any question, there, hey, you over there, on the right ?” - asked  the philosophy professor, looking over at us.

Gazi lifted his head and said :

- “Professor you told us that everything is transformed , so where does the soul goes after the death, professor , what does it become according to the dialectic materialism”?

The professor did not change color in his face, nor did he show any anger, but

somehow  he seemed like he wanted to  stretch  out his arms  from the podium, reach Gazi and shake him. He then said:

 - “Oh you , you, I know where ,  I know where you are heading with these words.

- Listen Rosi, he addressed Gazi by last name, we have tens of students here who want serious answers to their serious questions. Dialectic is a big thing,  Rosi”-, and he began to “explain” his atheist stand starting with the idea of why so much evil in the world if there was a God.

So as the days passed we were bombarded with hatred for religion, for the true God, for  Pope John Paul II and his predecessors,  for the clergy , for the  religious institutions in general. For the Pope, this spiritual leader to millions of people, we were fed with   the most poisonous thoughts and accusations. We were told we were unlike other nations, we should not mind the Rome’s anachronic Pope.

In the end why would we? We had our own self -made  "popes", some prepared in the Moscow’s universities and some simply being blinded. We were taught that the Vatican’s Pope was a bloodthirsty criminal, and that the Vatican was our country’s  third  and most dangerous enemy after USA and USSR.  Hence we heard and learnt a heavy load of rubbish at school.

At night though, in the silence of our hearts and homes, we secretly tuned in to foreign languages ​​radio stations.  We would hear the total opposite of what we were hearing at school and we were both confused and sad. We wanted to believe our professors, yet, we were not sure that what they were teaching us was true.

One day   as we were walking together, in the  "rebels circle" ( we were given that name  after our “bad biography”) – we ran into a professor who kept us somewhat closer. He was a kind man who also liked a free coffee too. That day, as we offered him more than a coffee, we decided to ask this professor the same question, where does the soul go after death?

- "Boys, girls, look, the problem is, look  do not joke with such things, you know that we are supposed to be atheists,  we are supposed to not believe in the soul” –the professor said.

“There is nothing besides the body, the body dies, it is transformed , bones remain, then they are dissolved, look guys, do not ask such dangerous questions”.

- “But then “, - said Mara, a student who came five years later to school and who was from the South ,-“ then professor , please tell us , do you think the same as the professor who is "convicted" in absentia by the Vatican ?”

- "Ugh ... I am late for my lecture" - he rushed, - "leave it for later, do not mess with these things."

Make another donut that other coffee,- he asked the waitress,- “I will eat  it as I walk”

And he left us without answers.

We graduated and were sent back home, to where we were to work for the state owned enterprises or cooperatives, until we experienced the great shock of our lives, it was like a major lasting earthquake, a revolution, the  fall of Communism. Democracy and freedom were coming to us !

 April 25th, 1993. The Pope visited Albania. I worked in Tirana, the capital of the country at that time, and luckily was there and saw the Pope riding in his bulletproof car almost no farther than several meters away and do not know how to describe what I felt. It was a sea of people, the largest crowd ever gathered, there was serenity; there was enthusiasm, joy, prayers and tears. I remember Ava, my 4 -year relative who, as we followed the pope mobile pointed her finger at the Pope as the pope mobile moved on and shouted: "Papa, Papa, God, God",  and her mother excitedly  told her that he was  the Pope who was sent by God  to us. I heard that  mother-daughter exchange  and felt at peace and very happy. I couldn’t explain then what it was, now I know it was Grace touching our hearts, the veil was being lifted and we were able to see the Pope visiting us, the one who had been taught to hate him; he was giving us so much love, telling us the Truth, pointing us to the Source of all!  

A year later, I saw the Pope on Sunday April 10, 1994 during Easter in St. Peter's Square in Vatican. The next day my then husband to be and I were to be married in Rome. His parents were with us. That Easter Sunday, they, the cradle Catholics, were so excited. I saw tears in their eyes listening to Pope’s Urbi et Orbi blessing. They filmed the Pope’s address and were so happy. While I tried to grasp all what was happening, I could not help but think about my Atheist professor and many others. I was living a historical moment, not understanding it, yet being overwhelmed by what I was witnessing.  I began to explore and learn. I got to know the Pope a little, began to study the Faith and began to open my heart to Grace. After so many years, now, am better informed and definitely transformed, I rejoice in the canonization of the beloved Pope and his predecessor. I feel, acknowledge and am thankful for the many blessings. I also, in prayer, wonder how many more Albanians, like me were touched by Saint Pope John Paul II and whether my former professors have tasted the Grace of that true Love and Mercy that I am so much blessed with.

Thank a Priest!

We must thank God for our brilliant and caring priests. Please pray for them. There of course have been a few bad apples among them but there are so many among them who are  so Jesus like, so when you see a Catholic priest, thank him for his sacrifice of service... It takes a lot to be a priest and they do sacrifice a lot.  Our Lady of Fatima, as you protected Saint Pope John Paul II on that day in 1981, please take all the priests under your protection and wrap them with the mantel of your maternal care. Amen!

On this Mother's Day- asking God to bless all the mothers

My dear mom has plenty of stories, and she always shares with us.Today she shared some new ones. I am sharing one with you here.  When she was 11 years of age, she and her siblings had to carry heavy loads of corn filled sacks on her shoulders for many miles, as they (the family) were kulaks and they were left to live or die on their own.

She said: "...the back used to hurt a lot as it was a long journey , carrying those sacks of corn and our bones were not strong...." 

I better stop, really, every time she shares stories from her young age  in Albania (much worse then mine) I want to cry and scream " Why?" but then , I know what I have learnt from Mother Angelica who says:...".DO NOT WASTE YOUR SUFFERING. OFFER IT UP to THE LORD" 

Hence, I offer it up  to the Lord, for my mom and for all the mothers who have suffered so much. 

Please dear Lord bless my mom and all the mothers and may their suffering be the key to your Love and Mercy. Amen! Happy Mother's day every one! 

About forgiveness - a short reflection

It is so painful when someone tells us the truth about how we may have hurt them. It is even more painful to see how that hurt might have caused so much pain and suffering to that person or due to its ripple effect. How about we say a prayer for those whom we have hurt and ask for forgiveness at the same time. Ask them for forgiveness and ask God to forgive you. Do it all with a contrite heart, that will certainly set anyone free. As painful as it might sounds, it is great to know you are forgiven and loved. Let us beg for the grace of Humility so we can  really say and mean: "I am sorry" 
M.McCormack- March 30th,  2014

A moment with my mother- a poem

A moment with my mother….

By Merita  B. McCormack


March 3, 2014 

I look at my mother’s face and hands….
They speak a lot
Those hands that always held me
That cleaned and dressed me
That fed and caressed me, 
Those hands that have been moving forever 
To make things
To create things
To beautify things, places and people
To make the world a better place for me and others

I look at my mother’s hands and recall
How did they affect my world and others’
She is a real hero…
When everything fell on her shoulders
She moved her hands and knitted for us
She fed us, clothed us, protected us
She kept us going….
I look at her hands,
Her fingers are not as fast,
Yet she does marvelous things….
She tells me she is sorry she can’t do much
Yet she is still doing many motherly things
She says, sorry daughter I am tired 
And as she holds and kisses my hands, 
I get teary eyed…

And then I gaze at her face….
I look at those eyes that always give me 
The gentle, loving and affirmative look 
Though the rosy cheeks have now faded,
Yet she is rosy hearted….
Her lips are always defined 
Regardless of any make up usage
My mother’s smile is a forever stamp 
Upon her face and on my heart
I see the same look
Adore the same smile
Sense the same worry
Notice the same determination
Receive the same true love
That only a loving mother can give
And I thank God for my Mother 
And in silent prayer I ask Him 
To bless her as He wishes……
For she gave me first and foremost life and love...

She looks at me and talks about just anything…..
And I listen…because everything coming from her matters….
I treasure those words and want to once more say
I love my wonderful and loving mother…..

Few thoughts on prayer-from an unusual view point

Thoughts on prayer and on the Holy Spirit.

Have you noticed? We often come across the words such as:  "His will be done" or  "I am just an instrument in the hands of the Lord" or  "Holy Spirit will find a way , so pray about it".

So here are few thoughts related to those statements. We are designed to comply with God's will but often times we rebel, hence we encounter a lot of bumps in the road of our life time, and we worry. Again and again we  hear the words:  "Pray, pray about it", yet we don't pray as  much as we are enclosed in the shell of our Pride, a major deadly sin.

Whether we like it or not, the Holy Spirit will act, it  is in our nature to interact with Him, we are made for that interaction and final union. It depends how we will engage our will ,  it really depends on us, whether we like it or not, how to respond to the Holy Spirit who is always there, unchangeable and present. So think about it,  think of yourself or your family as a house by the shore of a river  or a lake or an ocean. The "Guest" ( The Holy Spirit) is coming  to your dwelling by a boat.  If we put out the welcoming mat  and clean the ramp for the Guest to enter in our home ( read: The  Holy Spirit entering our hearts), then  marvelous Graces (some times that Grace is in a form of trial too- so don't be discouraged),  will come  along with Him.  In that case the Holy Spirit will enter where ever He wishes, the entrance and interaction will be smooth and pleasant.  Now, if we remove the  "welcome" mat, if we close the door and remove the ramp, then the Holy Spirit will walk on water and will still  enter anyway, but of course there will be great waves  and sand all over, all caused by the the lack of the welcoming ramp and the mat. Does it make sense?
 Here is the question:  Are you putting out the welcome mat and cleaning up the ramp for the Guest, or are you removing it all and wait for the wave to really splash you and perhaps the sand to hurt you? So that is the meaning of prayer, it is the welcoming mat and the walking ramp for the Holy Spirit to visit you and  that you receive him willfully. I hope this explain what prayer is about from this angle.

M.M.

A thought on adoption as we celebrate on January 12, 2014 a special Feast

Here is a thought ...or best said  here are some momentary thoughts....

This Sunday (Jan 12, 2014)  the Church Universal celebrates the Baptism of the Lord (baptism of Jesus Christ by St.John the Baptist :) Now.....the teaching is that ...by baptism (immersion in the Waters) one dies to sin and through the raising (through the waters)one is brought into a new life, by the power of the Holy Spirit in that Sacrament(of Baptism). Being baptized means you are anew and are entering the big family of Christianity. You are becoming  a new member, and an adopted child of God and then you live in that family.......After baptism a lot of things might go wrong...and that's okay.. Thought about this for a while .....and as a parallelism  this could be helpful...Think of an orphan who is in his teens......who is finally adopted by a great family.....the orphan becomes  a child with parents and is loved dearly.......the orphan, though, is not necessarily fully integrated in the family for some time.....he/she gets to know the family, receives love, yet is not able to give back similar love.... until later in life....when he "gets" it...but the fundamental change took place at adoption.... That child is part of that family for good and is legally part of that family. The same thing with those people who enter the Church through Baptism, it is the first step, but the most important one, towards being saved, through the Grace of God.... So how does this thought sounds....Do you want to get baptized :-)?  Think about it! It is about God's unending love...!
Happy the Feast of the Baptism of our Lord.

MM

You say Happy Holy Days...!

Ok, it is a joyful season, so let's not get mad and upset when people , especially when those well trained clerks at the busy stores greet you with a "Happy Holidays"...At those moments try to CHEERFULLY and LOVINGLY respond this way: "Amen, same to you, Have Very Happy Holy Days ",-and think: The Immaculate Conception, Christmas, The Holy Family, Feast of our Lady, Epiphany of the Lord, The Presentation, Baptism of the Lord etc...all these Holy Days fall within the Advent and Christmas Season....so smile , be happy about these Holy Days and remember: they say it but those with an agenda who have trained them think they are not saying it!  meanwhile, Have a Happy and Blessed  Advent Season!

Rest in my wounds ......

Today is Wednesday....have a happy one....As we recite the Holy Rosary today we meditate upon the five Glorious mysteries of Christ... (Resurrection of Jesus, Ascension into Heaven, The Descent of the Holy Spirit at Pentecost, The Assumption into Heaven of Blessed Mother Mary both in Body and Soul and the Coronation of Our Lady as Queen of Heaven and Earth...)Pondering upon them, entering those mysteries is so peaceful and joyful...I love those mysteries and always look forward to meditate upon them as we pray, but I think the Lord wants me to share this below:....Before he was Resurrected and Ascended into Heaven, where He is seated at the right hand of God the Father, from where he will come again, He wants people to know that through Jesus Christ, God became flesh and dwelt among us ...he did so out of LOVE for Humanity, his creatures which He knows all by name before we were born....and He died on the Cross for our sake and for our salvation and he knows of every pain and suffering we are all going through....He knows of our troubles, tribulations and worries and he is inviting every one of us to REST IN HIS WOUNDS and to CONSOLE HIS SACRED HEART.... May God bless you all and have a Glorious Wednesday....
Love
Merita B-McC

Offer it up....

This is for women in general and mothers especially: Please do not despair, ever,....you do serve others constantly...be joyful and happy knowing that very little job you tackle, every task you complete, regardless of time, effort or energy you put in it, because you put true love in it, that is taken into account as a service for the good of others.. you just have to learn to offer it up for a certain person or intention..vocalize it, make it known who are you offering it up and the fountain of mercy and consolation that steams from that sincere offering will come to you in abundance and it is so rewarding.... God bless you all ! 

Are we religious and why...

I just thought to share this before heading out....we are born with a design in our hearts to worship SOMEONE. Revelation (OUT OF LOVE) has taken place in the Old Testament and the Incarnation, Crucifixion,Passion, Death and Resurrection of Christ sealed the Salvation history....It is proclaimed and affirmed that the Salvation is within the reach of the Church that Christ founded upon the ROCK....yet many of us think and behave as this has never been brought about to Humanity.... except we keep one trait, we behave religiously ...but......think about it .....YES WE DO.....and YES WE CAN behave religiously (as to worship a higher power) because we are designed to worship...Now the question is who is the god each and every one of us worship and why...many worship sports,, some are so crazy about academia or arts, a lot worship power and sex, a lot love alcohol and drugs, many love their body, ego and pride, a lot of people are fond of food, hence we have gluttony, some fall into self-pity to the point of despair ... ..... Stop for a second and think: Who am I worshiping today and ....are these "high powers" the ones who would finally save my soul ....?

Happy Feast Day of St."Padre" Pio

Taken from EWTN.COM

Highlights Of His Life 25 May 1887. Born in Pietrelcina, Benevento, Italy of Grazio "Orazio" Mario Forgione (1860-1946) and Maria Giuseppa de Nunzio Forgione (1859-1929). Padre Pio's Family Home 26 May 1887. Baptized Francesco Forgione. 27 September 1899. Confirmation. 22 January 1903. Took the Habit of the Order of Friars Minor Capuchin (age 15), entering the novitiate and taking the name Pio. Until priestly ordination he would be called Fra. (Fratello/Br.) Pio. 22 January 1904. Made his First Profession of the Evangelical Counsels of Poverty, Chastity and Obedience. 1907. After three years of temporary profession he pronounced his final vows. 10 August 1910. Ordained to the priesthood in the chapel of the Archbishop of Benevento. September 1910. Received the Stigmata visibly for a short time. He begged God to take them away. He confided it only to his spiritual director. November 1911. Supernatural phenomenon came to the attention of his superiors when he was observed in ecstasy. 5-7 August 1918. Transverberation of the heart (the phenomenon of the wounding of the heart indicating the union of love with God). 20 September 1918. Received the Visible Stigmata, which would last for 50 years, while praying after Mass in the choir loft of the (old) Church of Our Lady of Grace, next to the Friary. Our Lady of Grace 1919. Rumors that the Church would transfer the local saint began to agitate the populace of San Giovanni. 2 June 1922. Orders of the Holy Office (today the Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith) began to restrict the public's access to Padre Pio. 1924-1931. Various statements of the Holy See deny the supernaturality of Padre Pio's phenomena. 9 June 1931 (Feast of Corpus Christi). Padre Pio ordered by the Holy See to desist from all activities except the celebration of the Mass, which was to be in private. Early 1933. Pope Pius XI orders the Holy Office to reverse its ban on the public celebration of Mass, saying "I have not been badly disposed toward Padre Pio, but I have been badly informed." 1934. Padre's Pio faculties are progressively restored. First the confessions of men are allowed (25 March 1934) and then of women. (12 May 1934). 23 September 1968. At 2:30 a.m. he died in his cell. As he had foretold he lived sickly but died healthy, with the stigmata healed. 26 September 1968. Buried in the crypt prepared for him in the Church of Our Lady of Grace. Back The Man  -  The Franciscan  -  The Priest  The Mystic  -  The Saint  -  Multimedia

Bl.Pope John Paul II points Albanians towards their own daughter and sister- ...watch the video!

Bl.Pope John Paul II addresses the Albanian Nation and points them to their own daughter, the wonderful and only Mother Teresa.(now blessed also :-)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MmgVsMy2zJk

Take up the Cross! Do not be afraid!

1 March 2013

At this time, as the month of March begins and the Spring is about to come, the History is being made. The Catholic Church is without a Pope, an Interregnum time is on, the world is watching the Catholic Church and many , who are not catholics do get engaged in conversations and do give opinions according to their formation and according to their understanding of our Faith. Many may be simply sympathetic, some may be sceptic, but a lot of people could even be insulting and humiliating towards our Church, our Faith and the Clergy. Just read the press or watch the secular media and you get the gist of it. But, please dear friends, rejoice and do not despair. The fact that they are engaged into the Conversation, even with bitter words, is a sign that their souls thirst to know the Truth, according to the Natural Law, they are designed to know the Truth but separated from it from the Fall and the consequences of Concupiscence. Remember, friends, what the Sacramental and Actual Grace has done in the souls of the Faithful(read the yield of the Fruits of the Holy Spirit) , that is lacking in many thirsting souls because of willful rejection. So as Lent is continuing, please keep in your prayers all the people and be CHARITABLE. Engage and lovingly explain our Faith. You never know what a smile or a kind word could bring about. Pray to give up Pride, Donate to give up unnecessary Possessions and Sacrifice to give up some Pleasures so we can better serve the Lord and his World. Take up the Cross!!! Do not be afraid! Have a wonderful weekend everyone!